Just when I think it's all coming together, it all falls apart.
I am torn between these paths.
I am stuck at a roadblock of confusion.
You say these words.
You say them and you know what they mean to me.
But they mean something else to you.
You occupy my mind only half of the time now.
When you do, I feel it all.
You don't see.
You don't feel.
I am exhausted.
I am drained.
I need something to change.
I need to get out of the in between.
I am faltering once more.
I have taken the wrong path.
It led me back to the start.
Now, here I am again.
Just trying to get through each day.
I see you everywhere.
In my thoughts.
In my dreams.
In my memories.
No one said it would feel this way.
I know what needs to be done.
I know I can't have what I want.
I know what I want isn't possible.
I know you don't want what I want.
I know I shouldn't want what I want.
But none of that makes it any easier.
It doesn't hurt knowing how you feel anymore.
It hurts knowing that it is no longer an option.
It hurts knowing that I have to let go.
One of these paths is false.
It is a trick.
It will only lead me back to the start.
I will not take that path again.