I keep thinking of you, you're on my mind

for the 57,000 time this morning.

Why do you constantly occupy my mind?
My thoughts are torturing me.
I guess after 14 months of being with someone, and about 11 months living with them
you can relate just about anything to them.
Is it a curse or a blessing?

I don't know how to act anymore.
I don't know what is right or what is wrong.
I don't know how I should feel.
But I know how I do feel, and what I do want.
I would like to believe that it's okay for me to feel this way and want these things.
But I know I'm wrong.
I know it isn't what you want.
I wish I could fast forward to 2 months from now..
Maybe then we could be together.
I could skip all of the anxious days.
I could skip all of the realization and longing.
But maybe I need all of that.
Maybe I need to miss you to realize what I'm really missing.
I just hope it's sooner that I realize than later.